Playing to my strengths

If you read my blog, you know that the writing is coming slooooowwwly. I am just not happy with anything I have written--and I have written tons since Summers at Blue Lake. It is frustrating to work so hard with so little results. Like dieting without getting skinny--what's the point? The more I tried, the worse it got, and I began to panic. I feared (and still do to a small extent) that I will never again write anything that merits publication. Today, I got an email from a woman in CT who just finished my book. I have received a bit of fan mail since my book came out. Mostly from folks I know. I love all my nice mail, but I am positively giddy when I get notes from people I don't know.

I got this email today. Thanks, Julie, for that lift! As I read Julie's note about why she enjoyed my book, I realized that the aspects that she liked were missing in my latest manuscript (the one I am trying to revise--or rewrite as the revisions are more like Extreme Home Makeovers than Trading Spaces). I guess I was trying to write a serious book where my character evolve and have breakthroughs. A meaningful book with doses of hard reality. But what is missing from this book is the element of fun and frivolity. I was able to do both (fun and seriousness) with the last novel because I could go back and forth in time between two different stories. The story that took place in 1983 was more light-hearted, and it broke up the sobriety of the year 2000 story.

I then started to think about the other letters I received and the book clubs I attended. I remembered the comments about what people liked about the book. They told me of passages that made them laugh. They said they enjoyed certain characters--the grandmothers, in particular. Readers like the seemingly real reminiscences and details. They are anxious to read another book, and I need to deliver it. I can do this. I am now going back through my second book, and I am going to try a new tone. I think that even I will enjoy working with playfulness. Sometimes I can get caught up in my own seriousness. My authorness. I am not sure what will come out of it, but I need to trust this process which is scary in a leap-without-a-publishing-contract kind of way. That's all for now. I'm off to play.

Weekend writer

Many people ask me about my second book. I don't always know what to say. I wrote one, finished it years ago, but my agent felt it wasn't the right book with which to move forward. Book two is pivotal in a writer's career. There is enormous pressure (real and perceived) for me in this my sophomore effort. I feel like I can't leave my book two characters behind. So I am trying to rewrite the book to make it have more of an impact. To say this is scary is an understatement. I try to write for the joy of it without thinking about my agent's voice on the phone or possible publication or future reviews. I have said before that I am currently listening to the Eckhart Tolle/Oprah A New Earth web venture on my walks. I am familiar with Tolle's The Power of Now and have studied meditation with one of his pupils. In this vein, I am trying to stay present and write. But I find all sorts of excuses not to sit in front of my computer. Perez Hilton. Computer solitaire. Food network. Vices I am not proud of. Add into this equation the late suspicion that I, along with certain members of my family, are affected by ADD--Attention Dances Differently. I digress. Where was I?

This morning, I woke at 5:30 with my characters dancing in my head. So I sat down and started writing. Since I quit my job, I have not been writing on the weekends. I feel like I should devote that time to my family. But this morning, the house was quiet. What a wonder to write in my free time instead of thinking--I have to write in my scheduled writing time and get finished so I can start painting by X o'clock so I can complete this before the kids come home from school. It has been a long time since I reminded myself of why I write. Because I love it. I take time out during the week to do things for family and friends. There is no reason why I can't on occasion write on the weekends and prove that this really is a happy pasttime. Maybe the paycheck will come, but I cannot let that consume my thoughts. In the now of things, in present awareness, I can find glory in the doing.

Book two

I am in brainstorming mode for my next book. Although I already have a follow-up book written, my agent and I are trying to decide if it is the book that should directly follow Summers at Blue Lake. So many factors are involved. It is hard to predict the industry. Number two book is almost more important than the first one, because that is the book that will set you firmly in the readers' minds. And it needs to take the momentum of the first book and carry it. It's about tone and drive. Is the book I have completed a good match? I don't know. I can only take the advice of the professionals with whom I have surrounded myself. Am I happy at the prospect of writing another book when I have one finished? Not really, but I want what is best for the long term heath of my career. The manuscript that is finished will come out eventually. In the interim, I am going to write another novel and hopefully move forward on this path.

It's times like these, I wish I were a songwriter instead of a novelist.