Taking a whale for a walk in NYC

I already said I went to NYC and saw my first Broadway show. I guess the reason I haven't gone to shows is that I'm always at the museums. The occasion for this show was my son's chorus trip. They've gone in the past years, but we never went with them. Jonah brought the papers too late or finances were an issue. (They always want the money around the holidays.) But this was his last year to go, so we went and saw Phantom. Of the choices, I would have picked Lion King, but Jonah wanted Phantom, and it was his trip. The musical was in the afternoon, which left the morning in NYC open. We were being dropped off at 10 and had to eat and be back to the theater by 1:30. What to eat? What to do? We could go to a museum, but that would leave little time to see much and we'd still have to pay the $20 admission. I suggested walking to see the renovated Grand Central Station with its shops and restaurants. I also suggested walking up to Central Park. I tried to get Jonah to participate in this pre-trip planning. The most I could get out of him was that he would like either pizza, a barbecue joint, or chili for lunch.

I thought the excitement of the city would wash over him once we got there. I was wrong. Once we were actually in the city, Jonah was sullen. I don't like big cities. UGH! I used an analogy with my mother-in-law telling her it was like trying to walk a whale around NYC on a leash.

He eventally agreed to Grand Central Station after my iPhone indicated it had a bookstore. So I started walking quickly in the direction of the station. Jonah plodded behind. At one point I almost turned around and told Jonah to keep up, but then I had an A-HAH moment. Why should he keep up with me? This was his trip. We weren't pressed for time. I slowed down to his pace. It was hard. I like to walk fast. But I tried to look around and really absorb the city rather than getting ot my destination. Later, we opted for brick-oven pizza across the street from the theater. (Never my choice but I was able to get my favorite topping--eggplant.) I don't know if Jonah knows how I struggled to let him have the trip his way. Maybe he doesn't even think it was his way.

Day later, I heard a radio interview about mindfulness and how parents always rush their kids. I am terribly guilty of this one. It talked about present moment and teaching moments. The best way to show kids the power of now (a la Tolle) is to let them see you as a parent be totally immersed in the moment. If by totally immersed in the moment they mean running around like a crazy person shouting, "Let's go, we will be late! MOVE!" then I have it covered. I think I even rush my kids when we are ahead of schedule. Mark is the same. So, we have some work to do when it comes to teaching our kids to be in the moment. I think for me, it'll take a few more walks around the block with a whale on the leash.

Weekend writer

Many people ask me about my second book. I don't always know what to say. I wrote one, finished it years ago, but my agent felt it wasn't the right book with which to move forward. Book two is pivotal in a writer's career. There is enormous pressure (real and perceived) for me in this my sophomore effort. I feel like I can't leave my book two characters behind. So I am trying to rewrite the book to make it have more of an impact. To say this is scary is an understatement. I try to write for the joy of it without thinking about my agent's voice on the phone or possible publication or future reviews. I have said before that I am currently listening to the Eckhart Tolle/Oprah A New Earth web venture on my walks. I am familiar with Tolle's The Power of Now and have studied meditation with one of his pupils. In this vein, I am trying to stay present and write. But I find all sorts of excuses not to sit in front of my computer. Perez Hilton. Computer solitaire. Food network. Vices I am not proud of. Add into this equation the late suspicion that I, along with certain members of my family, are affected by ADD--Attention Dances Differently. I digress. Where was I?

This morning, I woke at 5:30 with my characters dancing in my head. So I sat down and started writing. Since I quit my job, I have not been writing on the weekends. I feel like I should devote that time to my family. But this morning, the house was quiet. What a wonder to write in my free time instead of thinking--I have to write in my scheduled writing time and get finished so I can start painting by X o'clock so I can complete this before the kids come home from school. It has been a long time since I reminded myself of why I write. Because I love it. I take time out during the week to do things for family and friends. There is no reason why I can't on occasion write on the weekends and prove that this really is a happy pasttime. Maybe the paycheck will come, but I cannot let that consume my thoughts. In the now of things, in present awareness, I can find glory in the doing.