A final thought

***I do not intend a running commentary on the events taking place in my community. I hope to make this my last statement on the matter until the time when a verdict is reached, but I did want to add to my previous blog.

Today my neighbor, the husband and defendant in the murder case, released a statement through his lawyer that he is not guilty of this crime. Knowing the children and the family, I want more than anything else for this to be true. He deserves a fair trial in our system. I debated about taking down my earlier post, but I think it is a fair snapshot of what I and numerous others are experiencing as we move through this tragedy. Beyond that it is a testament to the scourge that is domestic violence. If this man is innocent of murder, then he, too, is a victim of domestic violence as it casts its large shadow over our society. Imagine a world in which law enforcement no longer needs to look to a spouse as the prime suspect in a murder investigation.

The sun will rise

In my blog, I make it a point to be candid about my influences and the sometimes frenetic life of a mother/artist/writer. I have not had an entry for two weeks because the latest issue is nothing short of tragic. Two weeks ago, a mother of four (my ten-year neighbor--until the family moved in January) was murdered. She was beaten, stabbed, strangled, and drowned. After an almost two week investigation, the police arrested her husband.

I live in a tiny neighborhood in a small community for whom these events have been devastating. I have personal sorrow over this. This sadness includes watching the pain that others are experiencing as they grapple with not only the questions of a spiritual/emotional nature but also the uncertainties of physical requirements. Four children, besides being parentless, are displaced from their home. Family businesses are at stake.

I cannot begin to catalog the atrocities that stem from this singular attack. The ripples, of which I am but a small one, fan out in all directions. I was struggling to confront my new novel and embrace my paintbrush before this happened. Now I am paralyzed. How can I make meaning out of the unimaginable? How can I do something so frivolous as telling a made-up story when the gravity of such a reality is on everyone's mind? If I, a casual friend of the family, am feeling this much anguish, imagine the anxiety and grief of the close friends, the blood relatives, the church, the community. My children feel it. How can I talk to my own children when I don't understand?

But, this is not a singular event. According to the Pennsylvania Coalition Against Domestic Violence, there were 120 domestic violence related fatalities in Pennsylvania in 2007 alone. Multiply the pain of my community by 120. Multiply that by the number of years it takes a community to heal. In the past, I have done workshops at the local shelter that houses and transitions survivors of domestic abuse. In the time I have spent there, I noticed what appeared to me as a deficit of women from upper/middle classes. Domestic violence knows no class boundary. What is the stigma that keeps these women from self-preservation? I don't have answers. What I have is question after question looping through my brain.

And yet there is surety amidst the chaos. The sun will rise. I know enough about my own inner processes to know that when I find my voice again--and it may take some time--this tragedy will inform my art. How can it not? Art is the computer through which I personally process the world. The results? I am not talking about heavy-handed message or great social activism here, though that is possible and certainly within my reach. But there will be nuances--some so subtle that I, as the author or painter, might not be aware. For this I am grateful. Because of this, I know that art is no little thing, and I have to make no apologies for being an artist when humanity is flailing. Guernica, anyone? I am not Picasso, but I know that I have to be the transformation I wish for those who are in mourning--and art can be a great converter. Good art or bad. It doesn't matter. It is the action, steeped in optimism and intent, that transforms pain into purpose, into beauty. Maybe that will be the motivation that allows me to make that not-so-trivial first stroke with my paintbrush.

*Please click on the link to Pennsylvania Coalition Against Domestic Violence to find out more including the article "31 People Die in 31 Days During Deadly Wave of Domestic Violence in PA". Also Click to Empower . Your click will provide a dollar toward education and job training programs which will help to financially empower survivors of domestic abuse.

Paper dolls

Over the last month, I have twice gone to the local domestic violence shelter to do a small bit of programming. Five years ago, my mother, who has been a volunteer with the shelter for 9 years now, came up with an idea to make paper dolls with the residents. With my work teaching creative journaling, it seemed a natural extension of what I did to take on facilitating this group. The idea is based on a book Soul Mate Dolls by Noreen Crone-Findlay. The book describes how to make paper figures to personify grief, remove stumbling blocks, and celebrate joys. The women in our group, most of whom are in transitional housing, made two-sided dolls. One side represented her life in the past in which she experienced abuse, and when she flipped the doll over, she worked on personifying the person she wants to be in the future. For someone observing the creation of these dolls, the process is pretty inspirational. I have roadblocks in my own life, but nothing like these women face, so to see them making a physical representation of their journey is awe-inspiring.

Before this month, I had not done the paper doll workshop for some time. I got a push to do them again because of the upcoming art exhibit at the Lancaster YWCA. The theme for the exhibit is Hope, Creativity, and Healing: Reconstructing Your Life After Sexual Assault. The show will be on display from April 4th (for First Friday Lancaster events) through the Annual Take Back the Night Event on April 10th. The paper dolls will be on display at the exhibit. I will have some pieces of my artwork, relating to female empowerment, on display as well.

I hope that people will take time to come to the YWCA, 110 N. Lime Street, Lancaster PA, to see the exhibit. It is quite powerful to take in the works that these brave women have created. I invite everyone who can, to join us. Make a night of it on Friday, April 4th. Visit the YWCA with reception from 5-9PM. (Besides my work and the paper dolls, there will be pieces by Mimi Shapiro and Mary Lou Weaver--exceptional artists, both of them) and then head to gallery row for other First Friday exhibits.

So many things in Spring

I have a lot going on this spring...to say the least. In additional to my professional activities, the kids are participating in track and a musical, both of which require lots of practices and lots of surreying (the word sounds more bucolic than taxiing). Mark and I are making a few weekend trips both as a couple and with our family. One of those trips includes us all running in a road race--my first in two years. Yikes! Another includes matron-of-honor duties. Double Yikes! I am teaching religious education to my son's class. The curriculum centers on tapping into the creation forces that made life possible and becoming creators ourselves. Art, poetry, music--It is right up my ally. (Except that music part. Seven years of piano lessons for naught.) I am also accompanying my daughter on an overnight environmental field trip in which I will teach about the food chain.

But it is the professional doings that I want to highlight. I spent the morning updating the NEWS section of my site, and I hope that folks will check it out. A variety of interesting stuff going on with which I am pleased to be involved. The Lancaster Literary Guild is having its first ever literary festival. The Lancaster YWCA is hosting an art show as an avenue of hope in the fight against domestic violence. Other things, too. Check them out and let me know what looks interesting to you.